We all have those stories, about a stupid ex. Well, I think my friend may have the best one yet. I am not sure if this is a stupid ex boyfriend story, or just a horror story…I write it, you decide.
My friend dated this man on and off for about 9 months. During this time, the ex (called The Idoit), unknown to her, slept with several other women, after he said he loved her, after he said they were exclusive. Yes, he cheated – she caught The Idiot “entertaining” another woman at his house. He actually got mad at her because she had the nerve to ring his doorbell when she saw the other woman’s car in his drive way (I say, yay her!)
A few weeks later, she finds out she has the has an STD called HPV, the virus that causes cervical cancer. She has never had any STD before, so obviolsy The Idiot got it from one of the other women and gave it to her. She calls and tells The Idiot, says he needs to get tested, tell all of his partners, and stop having sex until the results come back. He starts yelling at her, telling her something about how she doesn’t control him and she is not a part of his health decisions, refuses to get tested, and says that if he decides to get tested, he will not share the results. He does not answer to her.
She reacted the way any woman would; she starts contacting his friends and family to talk to him about the situation, and contacts The Idiot several times herself as well. The Idiot goes to the police to report her as “harassing him.” The police call my friend, she tells the officer what is going on, the police officer calls The Idiot back, tells him he will indeed get tested and share the results, AND that if he does not give the results to my friend within a reasonable amount of time, she has the legal right to follow up and get the results from him.
Moral of the story? Don’t be a stupid, self-centered, narcissistic jerk who cheats on his girlfriend, gives her an STD, refuses to get tested, then tried to get HER in trouble with the police. It will backfire and you will come out looking more like an ass than before. Oh, so many jokes, so little time..