Archive | June 2013

Life is Messy

Looking at my house, it’s a mess, to put it nicely.  The dishes are stacked up in the kitchen sink and counter. There are glasses everywhere – on the kitchens table, on the counters, the coffee table, the outside tables, in the garden, in my bedroom, my sister’s and nephew’s bedrooms, and I think I saw one even in the laundry room.

My clothes are everywhere in my room and bathroom. The bathrooms need to be cleaned. The entire house needs to be dusted, wiped off and organized. And vacuumed. And mopped.  There are tufts of cat hair. And dust bunnies.

Oh, yes, the house is a mess.

But that’s what happens when you have a life that makes you feel happy, loved, safe and ready to walk on the clouds.

Life has been wonderful. Mom and Dad came up for a great visit. The family talked, drank wine, ate snacks, laughed and had a great time out on the patio by the garden. The next morning there was coffee to drink and breakfast to eat. There was rushing to leave for work and doctor’s appointments. There were hugs and smiles, plans of when they were coming up again.

And then there are the visits to see him, the man who makes me smile. There is waking up next to him, warm, cozy, safe. It is fun to enjoy those wonderful moments. Getting to know him, talking, laughing and learning. Seeing his life, in his world. Sharing and breathing.

Life is messy. In the best moments, when you are busy living, it can get messy, dusty, dirty….and happy. And my messy house is a sign of a happy life.



Tip Toes

A slightly strange thing about me; I walk in my tip toes when happy. Always have. And I have been walkin on my tip toes a lot recently. Life, while not perfect, is pretty amazing.

There has been much laughter with friends, a wedding, lots of memories, celebrations, stories, wine, late nights, toe nail polishing, hair cuts and color, cleaning, training h, hopes, dreams, realizations, jobs, writing, plans and trips. There has been seer tea and dinners, shopping, surprises, smiles, years, prayers, late phone calls, confessions, truths, lies and daysdreams. And through it all, I have carried every heartbeat, every tear, every minuscule yet nebulous bit of intuition.

And there have been sighs and secrets told. Confidences met and turned, as every part of me, every part of my being, surges forward into the future, into the unknown. Because, I know, in my heart I hearts, that where I lead is a good place, ful of everything that that is dated to be hoped, wanted, desired.

And yet I have let go if so much, it could fill a universe, but still does not even amount to a Tea cup. It is the paradox of letting go, breathing in, hoping out, feeling up and dressing down.

My sister has found a job, one that challenges and promises to keep her engaged, something vey hard to do with swine so brilliant. There are two kittens who are bottle fed, who put and play, bringing smiles with cute eyes, fuzzy bodies and little noses.

Mom and Dad are coming; another MRI, more prayers and we wait for good news. My nephew is settling in to his new home, with cooked meals, clean sheets and possibilities. Friends starting new lives, adventures and dreams.

And me, settling in to my new role, owning my role in the new skin. A leader to whom the torch is past. The time of fear and uncertainty is done, the time for strength and benevolence is now. A gentle but firm hand, fair in application, full of Grace is that for which I pray. Wisdom, patience, understanding and to be what is needed.

And hen there is the promise of he future. The job with so many possibilities, opening up before me. And him, with his familiar hands and voice that I have known.

And mostly because, all because, my heart is happy, I walk on my tip toes.

The Fuzzy Life

So I have a big “S” on my forehead. Especially when it comes to anything cute and furry. One of my best friends has run and animal rescue group for almost 2 years. And for the first year I was really good – I helped out with money donations, would always be available to promote special needs animals and provided a safe place for her to vent when things got overwhelming for her. I never once took in an animal.

And then…I agreed to foster two feral cats. Well, they were kind of feral as in they didn’t hate humans and might be friendly at some point, but who didn’t trust humans enough to actually be friendly. What does it take to tame a cat? A lot of time, patience and yummy food treats.

Then my friend showed me the two “bottle babies.” Bottle babies are baby cats that have lost their mother but are not old enough to be weaned, so you have to feed them from the a bottle. She mentioned that she had no place for them to go and was not sure what she was going to do with them. Oh yes, my friend is a master.

And I am a sucker for anything cute and fuzzy. And these fuzzy babies are adorable wrapped up in an extra layer of cute. I mean you just want to eat them with a spoon they are so cute!  One look at them and that was it…I heard it. You know, that sound when you get completely sucked into something? Yep.

So every 3-4 hours my family and I (because yes, everyone is involved in it at this point) feed them. And any friends who come in the house are expected to help feed and cuddle them too. They meow and play, then eat and play, then rest and play, then play and play. They are learning how to run, well, actually waddle at fast speeds, tumble, wrestle with each other, jump and scoot around backwards.  They have big round full bellies, the cutest little noses and eyes that close in happiness when they eat. They have learned to purr, and do so frequently when snuggling after eating.

They love to nuzzle around in long hair. They love to run under the coffee table where we cannot get them. They love to sniff my other cats, who are not quite sure what to make of these mini-cats. They are a joy to watch and they do not have to do anything but exist to be adored. You  cannot hold one of them without falling in love with them. And one day soon, they will make wonderful pets.

And so right now, my life is completely full of family and cats. My sister and nephew living with me, my two furry babies that I own, the two no-longer0feral cats, and the two bottle babies. And while I do enjoy having the extra furry love, I am looking forward to when they are all adopted out and we get back to a two cat home!

If you want to save a life, adopt a rescue pet, or agree to foster! It’s worth the time and effort.