A Care on Your shoulder

It is often said that to have a good and happy life, you must take care of yourself first. And yet, we seem to find is so hard to do. It seems like self care and self awareness would be second nature to us by now. We can walk on the moon, edit DNA so diseased chromosomes are deleted, create the internet where the world’s information is in the palm of you hand…yet we still cannot master the art of self care.

And I wonder why that is exactly. And I don’t mean just pampering yourself. I mean Real self care, where we take care of our hearts, our emotions, our mental state and our resilience. Self care were we recognize the importance of making sure we are OK, really Ok, in this world.

When we do not tend to our mental and emotional health, we become bitter, angry, dysfunctional shells of our former selves. I have met people like that. The last man I dated was exactly that. Run from those kinds of people, those who are wounded and bleed all over you. Run because many of them are not only attached to their emotional wounds, but they have no intention of ever healing them. Why would someone choose to stay wounded? Because it takes tremendous strength to look yourself in the mirror, admit what is wrong and actually fix it. Many do mot have that kind of intestinal fortitude.

I have not been taking care of myself lately. I have been giving my time and self to other things and people. And it shows. My life is good, but I am tired and ragged because I have made the mistake of putting others before myself. One of my friends noticed this and chastised me. She reminded me that with both my parents being gone, if I fall apart there is no one to help put me back together. So I must not only take extra care of myself, but extra care in who I let into my world…I need to make sure my house, my heart, my home, my emotions, my life is all good, and then give to others. Not the other way around. And my friend is right.

And so it shall be, and already is. I am exercising again. Meditating, prayer, laughing with dear friends, eating healthy, some pampering, cleaning and organizing the house as the Great Purge of 2019 continues. But the purge is not only about things, it is about bad habits and people as well. I am taking positive steps to complete my own transformation that will take my life to the next level of wonderful.

Self care isn’t easy, because there are those who will criticize you and call you selfish when you are no longer doing what they want you to do. Don’t listen to those people, because anyone who loves you will understand and encourage you.

Self care is so important in this day and age of the more stress the better. It seems people wear their stress as a status symbol saying “look how important I am, I am so stressed.” Well, they can die an early death from that stress. Don’t let that be you. Take the time to enjoy those little things in life. Take the time to be grateful for what you have, and don’t concentrate on what you don’t. It will make a difference…small at first, but building momentum.

And slowly you will transform your life to what you want. But you have to have the energy to follow those dreams, make them materialize. We have the power to make our lives whatever we want…so what will you life be? Start with yourself, Taking care of yourself, being quiet and listening to the voice of God and your own voice within. reach deep down, where the heart meets the soul, where you hide when it is dark and quiet…it’s all there.

What I seek is happiness, purpose and of course, love. But a love that does not deplete me or tear me down. Love should feel good, it shouldn’t hurt. Love should energize you, not make you exhausted. And so, with a happy heart – because that is a decision too – I will go in search of. And when we find each other, not only will we take care of ourselves as we need to, but we will take care of each other as well. Until then, I will take care of my self one heartbeat at a time, until the life and love I want is right here.

Life is short. So take care of yourself.

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