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Life In Time

As I turn off the alarm clock, early in the morning, I wonder who thought up this Spring Forward thing? Who thought it would be a good idea to loose a precious hours worth of sleep. And I just lie there, in the warm bed, under the covers. As most of us do, the first morning on Daylight Saving Time. we have lost an hour already, and yet we just lie there.

But then I get up and start moving. And the day is beautiful. The sun is shining, birds are out, the air is promising words of Spring. I look out, around the yard, open the windows to let all the fresh air inside, and head outside myself. I let the cats out, who know it’s spring as well. The run outside to enjoy the spring air and all the smells. They life their noses into the breeze, then playful jump in the flowers, lie in the grass and chase bugs. Yes, after I am out in the air, I start to appreciate Daylight Savings. We loose an hour, but yet, we gain an hour of sunlight.

Time. It is what life is, a matter of time. That finite commodity. And in time, in where life happens, even when we just lie there. Even when we are lost. Even when we are confused. Even when we are a mess, or our lives are a mess. It is all in time. And it takes time to work things out, to get all the kinks gone, to do the homework, and complete the process.

But one thing is for sure, time is life, so if you want to have the time of your life, you have to get up. You have to move, even when you are tired, or discouraged, or scared.  Time is our friend, always there for us when we need him. Father Time. Yes, so many people waste the time that they have been given on such trivial things. They become selfish or bitter in their treatment of others, out of insecurity or fear.

So what marks good use of Time? I don;t know, for sure. But I think it is has something to do with quality of life. and I don’t mean being surrounded by nice things and taking expensive vacations, though there is a time for those too. I mean, the quality of person that you are. Do you live the best life you can? Do you make decisions out of fear? Are you reacting emotionally out of ego and defensiveness? Are you honest and truthful? Do you handle others with compassion and Grace?

I am not perfect by any means and I have made decisions out of fear, and they have been the wrong decisions to make. Every time. I have acted out of defensiveness, and hurt others. I have been not been truthful in all instances, and have sometimes lacked compassion and certainly Grace. But I am committed to using the time I have to being better at these tings. Because when you live your life in a sincere manner, you will bring what is sincere back to you, in time.

And when you are sincere, your laughter, your tears, your happiness, your sadness, your joy, your LIFE, all come from a deeper space.

So don’t waste any more time, you have already lost an hour. Use this time to be the best you that can exist. Be sincere, honest, earnest and you will see the wrinkles in time smooth out. And that will certainly put a spring in your step as you walk with Father Time.

Loves Labor

Today has been on e of those days that reminds you how lucky you are to be alive and have the life you do. First of all, it was a beautifl day with beautiful weather. The windows were open, the fan on. There was laughter, TV watching, rice crispie treats and good times.

But in the back of my mind, I had to say a prayer. A man I knew 7 years ago was going to his son’t funeral today. His son committed suicide, and he and his family have to find a way to pick up the pieces.

And so as the day went on, there was nothing that could keep me from beeing thankful for the life I have. No matter what happens, no matter what issues or hick ups, I am here, I’m alive, and that in itsself is a huge gift and blessing. We are given the gift of life, no one promises that will be easy, no one promised that it would be fair.

So, take care of the life you have, treat the people in your life well. They say a man’s charactor can be judged by how he treats those who can do nothing for him. Yes, indeed. And you never know when those people who can do nothing for you today will be in a position to help or hinder you down the line. Karma is a bitch of a mistress, so make sure it’s pleasent visit when she comes to call.

Because the best way to show your appreciation and thankfulness for the life you have been blessed enough to have been given, is to treat those around you well.  It may be hard, but life will multiply when you do right by others. you will flurish.

And every day, I want people to see how thankful I am by seeing how I treat those around me.

Unconditional Love

There is such a thing as unconditional love. And when you love someone, I have always believed that a part of them will always be in your heart. For this reason, I have always tried to end relationships on a nice note and with a hug. The fact that these two people walked the Wall of China, to meet in the middle and give each other one last hug before never seeing each other again, is beautiful. What an amazing, loving and respectful way to handle when a relationship comes to an end. Relationships never have to end in an ugly or dramatic way…but of course it takes both to make that happen.

This is such a beautiful vidoe and it will make your day.

Marina Abramovic and Ulay started an intense love story in the 70s, performing art out of the van they lived in. When they felt the relationship had run its course, they decided to walk the Great Wall of China, each from one end, meeting for one last big hug in the middle and never seeing each other again.

At her 2010 MoMa retrospective Marina performed ‘The Artist Is Present’ as part of the show, where she shared a minute of silence with each stranger who sat in front of her. Ulay arrived without her knowing and this is what happened.

An Almost Relaxing Weekend

Several months ago I said a prayer, the smae prayer I have said in one form or another for the past 4 years: Please give me something larger and more important to build than just myself. Open my heart and give me people with which to share this wonderful life. Bring Love to me.

Prayers do come true, but oftentimes in a different way that what we envision or expect. I was thinking alomg the lines of a partner, a lover, a wonderful man. Not so much, but what I have been given is much more solid than jut a romantic relaitonship. I have been given the ties that bind, that will always be there no matter what. I have been given family.

This weekend will be a wonderful non-relaxing weekend full of life. Tonight we are having a wonderful dinner of surf and turf, cooked by my wonderful and talented sister. Tomorrow it is a tour of the Fox Theater, on eof my favorite places inthe entire world. The history, the shows, and the fun I have had at the Fox in wonderful. The last time I was there was for the Blue Man Group, and it was wonderful.

Sunday will be church service followed by my sister and nephew headed up to Amicalola Falls for spending the day outside, hiking, laughing, taking pictures and having a picnic. Ut will be in the 70’s Sunday, and that is perfect for finally spending some much needed time outside in nature.

Also scheduled is house cleaning, organizing, reading and some movie watching.

And so it happens as it does most times, that when you set out to build something larger and more important than yourself, you end up with a better, richer life. Buidling others builds your own life, brick by amazing brick. It takes a villiage, of friends, of family and of love, to build a great life. And, like so many of the wonders of the world, we never quite get done exploring all the possibilities, all the secret, all the combinatons that are out there.

So build, build, build, because if it is built in earnest and with love, the result will be beautful. It will bring you Peace. And what brings Peace, also brings happiness.

After Your Dreams Come True

We work hard, all of our lives to reach our goals. We set them, we have dreams, we do what we can to make them come true. And certainly that is the case with me. I have worked, so hard, sacrificed, fought tooth and nail, set goals, burned both candles at the end, struggled and tired, failed and succeeded. And here I am, standing at the red rimmed edge of my dreams. They are right here, right before, right within reach, I can see them, feel them, smell them.  I have accomplished my dreams.

But now, as I look around, I wonder…now what? What do you do when you accomplish what you set out to do? What do you do when you have attained your dreams? It is truly magnificent, and I am happy. Life is wonderful and good, and I have to pinch myself evetry day to make sure I am not dreaming. I have accomplished it. Finally!

Now what?

Well, for certain I shall enjoy all the fruits of my labor, years long. And there is still work to be done, but the hard stuff is over. all that is left is to enjoy all the seeds I have sewn. But yet I cannot help but wonder what shall I do next?

OFr some of us, we never stop learning, never stop reaching, never stop growing and discovering. I want to always be doing something, always have a goal. So next is to set new goals, new heights which to soar. I am my family to keep settled, as right now they need me. And I will be there for them. Nothing bad will come to them, not on my watch. But beyond that, what do I want?

That is one of the keys in life – define what you want and go after it. And asI look around I have all that I want except one thing: Love. That four letter word that has illuded me all these years. That is what I want.  And I have so much of it already, in my family, in my friends, in everyone around me. But I want that best love, that last love of my life. I want someone with which to share this wonderful life I have been blessed enough to have. Someone who will be my best friend and confedant, and I theirs.

I want someone who needs me, and someone who will be OK with me needing them. It is a unuversal need, to be needed. To know that what we have to offer is beneficial to those we love.

And so it is, that I start my wonderful, magical journey to find that love. I am seeing a wonderufl man already…will he be it? I dom’t know, but I sure intend to find out. Wish me luck!

I Think I’ve Got This

Funny how life throws you curve balls. And just when you think you can’t do it, you can and you do. Just when you are not sure you can, you reach deep down within, and pull thge strength up to come through.

So my sister and nephew are moving in for a while. My sister is already settled, so to speak, by nephew won’t move in for a couple of weeks. Mom and Dad were up all loast week for Dad’s chemo treatment. He went in Wednesday and this one was really rough on him. The doctors are optimistic, but the chemo gets worse on him with each dose. So it’s tough to see him in pain and in such bad shape.

But I have managed to take care of everyone, all four of them, and make sure they have everything that they need. Mom has her own space, smoking area, bathroom and comfort things. Dad has his own room, both up and downstairs, and his own diet food and he feels wewll cared for. My sister has her own space and comfort things, food and such, Allan has everythig he needs for school, My sister has a new waredrobe, hairstyle and resume, along with interview suits.

And still there have been good food for good meals, wine, warm blankets, hot tea, cool water and plenty of space. There has been worry, laughter, hugs, memories, thoughts and time together.

So far I have been able to provide everything they have needed and wanted, right down for new books for Mom to read. Oh, there have been freak out moments, such as this past Monday. I can I do this? Can I do this? Will I be good at it? The answer is yes. Because this is family and failure is not an option. 

So I can do this, be the head of the household and take care of everyone. I was nervous because I knew I would always be the one my family leaned on, but I always thought there would be someone with me, that I would not have to do it alone. But here I am. I can can do this. And still work, and still have a social life and friends. And still be me.

Dreams

I have long said that I beleived that if you work hard, have faith and beleive, that your dreams will come true. Hard work and perseverance truly do pay off. And Now, during this time of my life, it is truly paying off.

I have struggled, I have been so very poor, I have worked all night and all day, I have cired so many tears, a river of tears, an entire ocean. I have known the pain of being too tender, had broken hearts, felt each piece break one heartbeat at a time, I have liad down next to love and woke up with lies. I have beleived the wrong men, men who knew too much, men who knew too little and man who didn’t know at all. Men who were late, early and men who never came at all.

I have tried with all of my heart and soul. I have stayed awake at night, unable to sleep or watching over those I love. I have krept out inthe morning, stayed too long, beleived when I knew it was wrong, taken calcualted risks that worked and some that didn’t. I have failed, so very hard. And I have fallen, so very hard, for him. And I have wondered, at night when the stars are quiet.

And I have known his footsteps as he nears the room, his smell, his looks, his everything. And I have known all of them, too well, too little and closed my eyes when I did not want to know. I have been a friend, a lover, a sister, a girlfriend, a fighter, a believer, a worker, an liar, a truther. And I have held my own heart, wounded, bleeding, beating. And I have put it back together. I have taped, banaged and bandaided my faith and belief in others.

And I have tried, so very hard.

And here I am. Finally. My dreams are coming true, both professionally and personally. Thank you to all who believed, to all those who faollowed, all those who cheered and rooted. Thank you to alal those who booed and hurt me too. For you too motivated me and made me better, though I may have not known it at the time.

And now, as I sit at the top of this huge, trechurous mountain, I see that the view is wonderful, beautifu. The air is clear and clean. And as I have have sweated, my heartache comin goout of my pours, dripping down onto the Earth, I know that every minute was worth it. I have Peace, and I have Love.

It’s all worth it, in the end. Every minute, every second, every moment.

To Rise or Wallow, That is the Question

Wallow or Rise

We all go through hard times in our life. All of us, as some point, will be hurt deeply, be betrayed, lied to, mislead and broken hearted. That is the risk sof being human, the risk of loving and being loved and the risk of being open to living life. All of us, during our lifetime, will have bad things happen to us that we do not deserve. We are given life, no one promised us it would always be fair or easy.

But I have a theory about those bad times. I think you have a choice – either let those times drag you down and hold you back like a ball and chain, or use those bad times as a stepping stone to rise above it all and become a better, finer, stronger, more comapssionate person.

Some people shoose to wallow in theri misery and pain. Those are the ones who lie to themsleves and others. Those are the ones who use others and hurt them as a result of the pain they are feeling inside themsaelves. It is a ref;ection of their own self loathing, and it is toxic. Have you ever been around those kinds of people? They make you feel good for a while, then, they start istreating you and blaming you for it. Get away, and run fast.

That is what happens when you choose to wallow. You become biiter, twisted. That is a terrible place to be. Going through the bad times are hard enough, who would want to stay there and add to the misery? Not me, but some people do. Don;t be that guy (or that woman).

Know that those bad times are only temporary. The pain is only temporary, even if it is so strong it’s almost blinding. It won;t be loike that in 10 years, 5 years, 1 year or even 6 months. DOn’t let the temporary bad events make a negative permanent impression. And you know what? Those people who hurt you? It drives them crazy to know that you are happy and doing well without them. Having a great life and being happy is truly bthe best revenge.

So don’t be afraid to sore, don;t be afraid to step over the hard times and rise above the pain, anger, fear and confusion. The view is much better from up here, I promise. And it’s never too late to start, so what are you waitin for?

Pride, Grace and Moving

We all  must learn to ask for hlep at some point in our lives. This is a very hard thing for me. It truly hurts my prode when I find that I cannot do something myself. I. Hate. It. But I had to swallow my pride and do just that recently. My nephew will be moving in temporarily and for 2-3 months my office needs to be his bedroom. Easy enough. Except that a huge heavy desk had to be moved out of the room, into the garage and the bedroom furniture on loan from my parents moved from their van to my nephews room.

So, I swallowed my pride and asked my most recent to to please, please, please, help unload and move. This was hard for me and he did not make it easy. Why not call the man you are dating now? (He runs his own company, is not available during the day and had a family emergency). Why not just get some movers? (hmmm, it costs at least $200 to get them, and since I have 2 people moving in, I am a bit short on cash at the moment). Why not get another friends? (I don’t ask a lot of friends for help. Very few people. Ever. Pride).

The result of me swallowing my pride? The ex came over and helped, everything was moved into place. The desk is dismantled and in the garage, the bedroom furniture is where it is be and the room is ready for my nephew to move in.  And my ex and I saw each other where we were not yelling at each other.

The moral of the story? Maybe it is OK to ask for help. Maybe pride is not always a good thing. Yes, we can write it and read it all we want, but until we really know it, it does not good.

And Grace. Yes ther is that word. It is very hard to have Grace toward someone who hurt you. And he did, a lot. And I have to admit, I have been very snarky to him. I am a fiesty southern red head, and he expected me to do that which I already told him I was not capable. I told him how I would react if put in thyat situation. And true to my word, I acted just as I said I would. He was surprised got very angry. And then I was snarky. And I enjoyed being snarky. That’s the thing about being feisty, you enjoy it.

But that is not Grace. And that is not forgiveness. It is hard to forgive when you are still hurt and angry, and it is hard to be Graceful when you enjoy being feisty. But that is what I must do. After all, my ex showed more grace than I when he showed up to help, moving heavy furniture, facing my mother and sister, still smiling and moving heavy things. I could learn from him in that regard.

And my life has been so blessed with so many good and wonderful things, that I should be less pridefull and more Gracefull. I cannot, in good conscience, ask for the blessings in  my life to continue and still behave in a way that is not condusive to having Grace. And so that will bemy motivation.

Pride, Grace, and moving.

Clean it Out!

We have all heard about the benefits of cleaning out the clutter. And indeed, there have been many articles written about it, and articles written as well.Read them here, here and here.  This is indeed something that has been put to the test this weekend.

It started in my bedroom. In my closet actually. And I cleaned it out. all the clutter, all the movie stubs, and the little things and reminders. Gone.  Along with all the shirt, pants and skirts that no longer fit. And I mean really don;t fit, like no matter how much weight I try to loose i will never again fit onto that. Gone.

And then I moved into the bathroom, and cleaned out everything that was his. Everything that that made me think of him. Gone. Along with all those empty or almost empty shampoo and lotion bottles. All the old things that I had never used and had gone bed. Gone.

Next was the main bedroom and where the most work went into cleaning out. all of the memories and cobwebs cleaned out. Gone. All the told thoughts, feelings and emotions. All the tears and hurts. All the times i hugged my pillow and wished i was not alone in the dark. all the time listening to the clock. tick. one heartbeat at a time. One teardrop at a time. One dream, nightmare, hope and crushed feeling at a time. Gone. Along with all the trash, old papers, noted, thoughts, writings scribbled on notebooks and napkins. Gone.

And the result is a clean life. no clutter, emotional or physical. Bags and bags of clothes to take to Goodwill, and more bags of trash to be taken out to the curb, soon to be picked up, carried away, far away, where i never again shall visit. What is left is bright, airy and full of promises. What is left if Spring.

Yes, I feel as though a weight has been lifted from my shoulders, my heart, my eyes, my soul.

And so it is, because you must get rid of the old, clean it out, in order to make room in your life for the new. If you want to move on and be free from the past, you must first break free from it’s grip. One of the first steps is getting the past from right there in front of your face, to free yourself from it’s ghosts. Let them go to haunt another. Let me not miss him him anymore.

And I am ready for all the wonderful things coming into my life, what is blooming right before my eyes. And this is the year that I want to find love. real, wonderful, inconvenient, can’t live without each other love. but maybe the key to finding that kind of love, you must first fall deeply in love with…your life. And that is exactly what I plan to do. But firsts I must clean out the clutter and trash. And make room for that which will make my heart truly happy.

A True Home With Love

We all have those moments when we look around and realize that our house is no longer just a house, ,but a home. It has been that kind of weekend for me. Friday nigth was a wonderful night of love, friendship, food, family and celebration.

My wonderful dear friend and one of my best ex’s came over for dinner and a movie. My sister made an amazingly delicious baked spaghetti and we all ate ourselves silly. it was delicious. and as we sat around the dinner table, in my home, we laughed, talked, ate, drank and were truly blessed and happy.

We snacked on cheese, crackers and wine before dinner, then moved to the table. It was as if I was visiting someone else life, not my own…as Iooked around and realized that my home truly was a home. Everywhere i look there is a memory of a conversation, a moment, a tear, a joke, some laughter, smiles, and…hope.

For so long, I have wanted someone with which to share my life. And now that I have so many wonderful things happening in my life, I have prayed, so hard and very sincerely, that I have someone to share all these wonderful things. Finally the struggles are over, and I have made it through those struggles alone. I have wept alone, floods of silent tears streaming down my wet cheeks. I have been frightened, scared of what the future may hold, alone.  I have held my own broken heart, in my hands, and wept for the loss of love that it has contained. And I have felt that broken heart start again, and felt it in my chest, one beat at a time.

I have pulled myself up, from the rubbled of the life never to be lived. And I have worked my ass off to be where I am now.

All of this I have done and gone through, alone.

Now, in this time when things are so wonderful, I want someone to share it with. I have paid my dues and walked in the dark alone. Now it is time to hold someones hand in the days of laughter and light.

This year, 2013, is the year of hope and dreams. Of love, light, laughter and the world being my oyster.

And the celebration of love has continued through the weekend with good food, many wonderful conversations with many good friends and good wine.

It is a beautiful life. And for all that I have and am able to share, I am forever grateful.

How far have You Travelled?

How far have you traveled?

Miles and miles and miles, Uncountable miles in the last year

I have traveled thousands of tear drops down these cheeks.

I have traveled millions of heartbeats around the universe.

I have traveled in dreams, nightmares, hopes and fears.

I have traveled countless breathes in this world, thinking of you.

I have traveled in cars, planes, trains, bikes, motorcycles and my own two feet in the past twelve months.

There have been miles and miles of smiles given, taken, stolen and hidden.

There have been oceans of thoughts in which to get lost, Across the galaxies of time.

From January to December and back again, there have been light years traveled in between raindrops.

In storms of emotion, a thousand ships launched, to find that safe harbor in my heart.

Hauntings and yearnings, longings and secrets kept, never even whispered in the darkest of the nighty.

There have been hundreds of miles of you explored in my mind, as thoughts race through endless nerves in my body.

There have been words written and stories read, upon pages and pages of paper.

From day 1 to day 365, there are trails of skins that have been shed, layers that have been peeled away, pieces of my heart that line the littered sidewalks of my memory.

There have been curse words and blessings uttered, prayers prayed and deals made.

Miles of laughter and promises, kept and broken.

Endless seas in which I was lost, ice storms where I found my way.

I have visited galaxies of lust, love, truth and lies in twelve months time.

And I have seen the the universes of trust, patience, hurt and confusion.

I have walked, bare foot, single hearted, upon the hot sands of your heart, leaving my footprints behind.

There were paths explored, caves overturned, mountains turned around.

I have climbed over doubts, run though dams of frustration, dug under surprises to find the root of it all.

I have been proud, ashamed, honored, trusted, betrayed, hated, loved, feared and wanted.

Wars fought, secrets kept, battles won, and tears wept.

All the while the ebb and flow of life and the moon followed by the heart and soul of one year.

Just one year.

How far have you traveled?

I have traveled a lifetime. That is how far I have come.

Sitcom Moment #4,287: A Car Ride with Sheldon and Leonard

We all have those moments in life where we swear this cannot be real life, and that we are actually caught in a sitcom. Because if we were to see this situation play out on TV, we would laughing hystirically. This is my life. Constantly.

The most recent example was this weekend when riding back home with my sister and oldest nephew, both os which have genuus IQ’s.  They are both into computers, anumie, science and other such things. I am usually very quiet when the two of them are the room. And they started talking about something concerning computers…and how a man (who is rather well known in their circles but i cannot remember his name) got mad at Sprint and wrote them a check…out in a hugely complicated mathematical equation.

And they started to argue…

About whether or not the check written out in a very complicated mathematical equation had intigrals in it or not (I a m not even sure if that is spelled correctly).  A very serious discussion took place.

If I had not been driving I would have fallen asleep.

I think I should start introducing myself as Penny.

My Best Valentine

I really don’t usually celebrate or make a big deal out of Valenetine’s Day, even when dating someone. And this year was no different. Please let’s not go out, let’s just stay in, watch a movie and order pizza. And so we did. And it was wonderful.

But when I went to answe the door, he had a big teddy bear that said “Hug me”, a box of choclates and a an amzizng box of chocolate covered strawberries from Sherries Berries. YUM!!!

And so it was, we ate the decadent chocolate covered strawberries, drank wine, watched a great movie, ordered pizza, and snuggled on the couch. Low key, warm, fun and wonderful.

And that is how you do Valanetines, Mari style.

What Not to do And To Do on Valentines – A Mans Guide to a Happy Woman

Guys, we know you try. But sometimes a little help can go a long way.  So, here is what not to do on Valentine’s, and helpful hints that will make her smile as well.

Don’t Say I love you – unless you mean it!  Those three words mean a lot, but they imply much more. There is an old saying, that until you say I love you, you are a free agent. So once those words are spoken, the game changes and she will expect that you mean you actually LOVE, that you only want to be with her and no one else. So if you are not ready to be exclusive, don’t say I love you.

Recently I had a man who told me he loved me…while he was sleeping with another woman. Yep, can you say sleaze-bag? He didn’t understand why I was upset at his cheating either, because he didn’t see it as cheating. He eventually fessed up that he just said it to ‘avoid confrontation and because he missed me. (Translation: I wanted to screw you AND the other woman. He probably said “I love you” to her too.)

Say I love you only when you mean it, only when you are ready to be exclusive and only when you are ready deliver what those words mean to her.

Don’t Date Someone – just so you don’t have to be alone and Valentine’s, then break up with her shortly thereafter.  Kind of a nasty thing to do to a girl, just because you don’t want to be alone.  I cannot tell you how many guy friends I have that have admitted to dating a girl only because they did not want to be alone for the holidays and broke up with her right after Valentine’s. Don’t be “that guy.”

Instead, wait until someone you are really interested comes along, and if it happens to coincide with the magic day of love, then all the better. Trust me, the right woman is worth the wait.

Flowers are nice but…Give her flowers just because it’s a Tuesday, and she will be a very happy woman. Roses are ridiculously expensive on Valentine’s Day, so why not save that money and give her a gift that she really wants instead? Maybe give her a rose with the amazing gift…and see how much she appreciates it. Besides, just as with an expensive dinner, anyone with a credit card can get her some flowers, do something for her that is distinctly you.

Don’t just do Nothing. Times are hard in this day and age. So what if you don’t have the money to really treat your woman for Valentines Day? No worries, there are plenty of wonderful things to do that don’t cost a thing. For instance, cook her dinner. If you are not much of a cook, how about give her a massage, a foot rub, scratch her back, run her a hot bath, or even better, take a both with her. I LOVE to take a bath with my man, It’s wonderful, sexy, intimate, and romantic. Don’t forget the candles and soft music.

The Dance – How about slow dancing with her to her favorite love song? For guys, this may sound silly, or may even make you a little sick…but trust me, she will love it. I had a man slow dance with me in in living room once, and I melted all over the floor. It was a t that moment that I knew I was in love with him. Yes, slow dancing is that good. 

And Finally – How about going parking and having a good old fashioned make out session? Remember when we used to do this as teenagers? When was the last time you did it? In the rushed world of being an adult, sometimes we forget just how wonderful, romantic and just plain hot it is to park and make out. I know I would love it.

The Sessions

rarely movies come along that truly tap into what is means to be a human being – without being mushy, gushy and annoying. But I saw a movie last night that truly moved me down to my soul. And I don’t mean int he chick-flick way like The notebook. I mean it truly made me proud to be a human being.

It is the best, most incredible, amazing, most honest, most moving movie I have ever seen. It was mezmorizing in its honesty. I literally could not take my eyes off the screen. It is an incredible story. It is wonderful, funny, honest.
Everyone should have to see this movie.
It is not a love story. It is not a romance. But it is a human and it is beautiful.

I am writing an article about it, and will post it here as well. In the meantime, go out and buy it on DVD, don’t rent it. You will not regret the investment.

Celebration of Love – The State of My Union

It’s that time if year again – where love is in the air. It’s Valentines Day, the day to celebrate love and everything that goes along with it. And for many singletons, and those who are attached in relationships as well, it is a time for shear panic. I have never understood the panic associated with this couples day celebrating love. Maybe that is because how I have always viewed Valentines Day.

Most of the time I am single for Valentines, because honestly I avoid dating men during the holidays like the plaque. If I am not already in a relationship when Halloween rolls around, I don’t even think about dating until after February 14th. This year I am seeing a wonderful man, but my view on the day has stayed the same.

For me, Valentines has not been about roses, chocolates and expensive dinners. And honestly I really hate going out on Valentines because every place is crowded, menu prices are jacked up for “couples deals” and it is just a big hassle. I would rather stay in, watch a movie, snuggle on the couch under a blanket, have a glass of wine and go to bed early. That sounds much better than getting dressed up, fighting traffic, trying to arrive on time for the reservations, going to a crowded place.

To me the day has been about a celebration of love, all the different kinds of love you have in your life. And when I look around, my life has an abundance of love whether I am seeing someone or not.

I have the best family in the world. We are super close, we are truly there for each other, support each other and love each other no matter what. Truly unconditional. And I am so lucky to have that because so many do not. I am very aware of how mucky and blessed I am in that area.

Next there are my friends. I have a very small group of close friends, though I know many, many people and have thousands of contacts. But my core group of friends are amazing. They are honest, loyal, have honor and integrity. Some I have known for 30 years, the newest for 3 years. And I could call anyone of them, and they me, no matter what, and we would be there for each other. And have been.

So when I look around at the amount of love in my life, a partner is the icing on the cake, not the cake itself. And that is how it should be, because having a full life means recognizing how rich are already are with what you already have.

So don’t worry if you are single this Valentines, because if you look around, you \have more love than you think you do. So celebrate it and be thankful.