It is amazing the how different life is when you are an adult than when you thought it would be as a child. As a child, you don’t understand things like working, or managing money, or getting up early, or even things like laundry. If you are lucky, these things seem to just magically happen.
And there are things that you assume will happen when you are adult that really doesn’t. For example, No one has died from falling in quicksand, or being eaten by a giant snake. I have not made millions from discovering a new kind of metal that could replace everything. And my parents did not live forever.
When I was younger, and even up until a few years ago, I thought healing was a straight line. I thought everything worked in a straight line – love, career, playing, shopping, figuring out what you wanted to do, making decisions, even being happy. But as an adult you learn that nothing is a straight line. Because we are different, and we have paths on which to meander and learn. There on some paths which we are supposed to only visit, some where we learn valuable, maybe painful lessons, and some that delivery us away from danger. After all, it’s a jungle out there.
And then there is the path of healing, which I also thought would be a straight line. I was wrong. what I have learned, is that this path too meanders. There are good days and bad days, or weeks or even months. There are waves. Sometimes those waves come crashing down and you feel like you were drowning even though you thought you were on solid ground. And sometimes you have days where you feel like all of it is done, and you are great. And in time, those stretches get longer and longer…but still there is no straight line.
And that is OK, because there is no timeline on healing. And who said it has to be a straight line anyway? I think that is a myth, just like quicksand. The problem comes when you try to force it, and deny that any more healing needs to be done.
Let’s face it, life a series of paths we must take. Some of those paths are better or more enjoyable than others. But would we want it any other way? The easy answer is yes, but really how deep of as faceted of a life would that be? An easy life would be easy, but we would miss so much depth and width of the person we were meant to be. And while the easy answer would be to have a compass in the great journey of life, would it really help? And would you actually want to use it? Because some of the unplanned paths we take, make our lives so much more rich, even if they require some care and healing afterwards.
So don’t play it straight. Go on those twists and turns. Give yourself the permission to take as much time, and as many paths as it takes to heal. It’s ok. Don’t fight the current, just ride the wave.
Life is short and straight lines are boring.